Pyramid Schemes / Cults

Allow me to first disseminate some excellent information that may well change your life.

Now that you are all equipped to tell the horrible truth from the fantasy-land fiction, let me tell you that there are a lot of people in this world that just aren't as intelligent as you or I. When Kelly and I first moved to Richmond we weren't working so we spent a lot of time out on the town getting to know the area. Waiting for a table at the OG, we were approached by a young couple who were also waiting to be seated. They were friendly so we chatted for a while. The gentleman asked if we'd like to join them and some business partners for a happy hour in a couple nights. Not having anything better to do, we said sure. The next day I called to confirm the plans and was told that it would be a little more than just a happy hour and I should check out his business' website. This is where any reasonably intelligent person becomes suspicious. Upon investigating the alleged "business website" it was plainly obvious that this so called "eCommerce" was nothing more than an internet based pyramid scam. I called the gentleman back and told him we weren't interested, then bid him good day. A shame too, they seemed like such a nice couple.

Two months later, after securing the fine job I now enjoy, I was perusing some publications at Barnes & Noble. I was approached by a fella who wanted to talk books with me. Eventually he asked me what I do for work. Rather odd, but I was reasonably sure he wasn't hitting on me so I told him I am an engineer. He used to be in engineering too he said, but now he runs his own business. Cool, I reply, what's your business? His business was eCommerce. I told him my firm is hiring if he ever wants to get back into engineering. Then I bid him good day.

A year or so goes by with nary a whisper of entrepreneurial scam artistry. We are visiting friends who are having a small get-together. Another couple who are attending the event are chatting with us about this and that, and its all very pleasant. At some point the female informs us that things are really going well for her lately. She's started a home business where she gets paid just for shopping online. Apparently this turn of events has changed her life. Her boyfriend elaborated and explained how he had been unhappy at college and quit to enter into this business with his girl. And it changed his life. They went on at length explaining how it all worked, how easy it all was, and how they had just come back from a seminar with "the multi-millionaires" that had started this business. They had all been told that soon they would be "multi-millionaires" too. They even took a stab at getting my wife and I to leave our lucrative jobs and come drink the magic cool-aid with them so we'd be ready when the aliens, I mean "multi-millionaires", arrive.

Admittedly I don't examine myself in the mirror that often, but when you look at me do I appear to be both destitute and fucking retarded? Where do these people come from and why to they think I want to throw my life away to go charging along with them into a life of bankruptcy and denied credit card applications? I spent a few brief moments contemplating the series of poor decisions that must have occurred in each of these people's lives that brought them to this point. The homeless man begging for change on the street corner still has some dignity. He has no place to sleep and depends on the money of others to feed himself. But at least he's not trying to drag the rest of us down with him.

Scammers are under the assumption that each and every one of us is as stupid as they are. Prove them wrong. If you think you know of a pyramid scam, and especially if someone has tried to recruit you into one, gather as much information as you can and notify the Federal Trade Commission here. Happy hunting.